Most people will need the services of a DJ once, maybe twice in their lives. If at all. So it’s not surprising that most people think that all we do is just play music. That’s probably because the only thing most people see is us standing behind our equipment and hear music coming out of the speakers. Seems simple! Anyone can do it…right?
Well, that idea is very popular. The evidence is the large number of DJ services in any given area. And not surprisingly, most are not in business very long, and even fewer are remembered ‘by name’ when DJ’s are discussed in general conversations. Why is that?
Actually, we’re doing MUCH more than playing music. I guess it could be considered a compliment that that’s the impression people have of us, as we know how difficult our job can really be. Contrary to popular belief, what we do is not that easy. I know, I know…I’m preaching to the choir.
Truth be known, we are the traffic cop for the event. Like it or not, we direct the timeline for nearly every event. And we fill many roles. Some might argue otherwise, but I would have to say that experience has shown that this is 100% true. We wear MANY hats!
To start, we spend hours preparing for the event. Securing the requested music, going over the planned activities and outlining ‘what’ is happening, and ‘when’ it should happen, and synchronized with ‘this’ particular piece of music. Hat #1: Producer/Director.
We arrive at the event (Hat #2: Driver) and, unless we have good friends, begin to unload all the equipment needed to successfully pull off the event by ourselves. Many times, as unfortunate as this sounds, we are treated as second-class citizens and are required to enter through a narrow back door which is as far away from where we actually need to be as is possible. We snake our way through kitchens dodging piles of dirty table linens, boxes of instant mashed potato mix, #10 cans of green beans, hot stoves, and irritated chefs, just to get to where we need to be. Those DJ’s without the benefit of a hand cart or equipment with wheels, are forced to strain backs and knees while penguin-walking their cases and totes to the reception room. (Hat #3: Roadie)
After working up several beads of sweat on the brow (a nice ‘look’ at a formal event), we basically struggle to get 10-pounds of equipment set up in a 5-pound space. It’s when we get rooms where the DJ has his own space with lots of room, plenty of outlets, and a loading door 10 feet away that’s at ground level with the parking lot just outside, that we look skyward and while looking for that single ray of sunshine, mutter under our breath, “Thank you!”
In my setup, I don’t use or need a table. But you would think I just said the sky was green when I tell the room staff that I don’t need the table they set up and skirted for me. “You don’t need a table?!” “Nope.” “But, you’re the DJ! You guys always need a table!” “I don’t, but thank you anyways.” They leave to summon the manager who begins asking me the same questions. 15 heated minutes later, they’re slowly tearing down the table expecting me to say something any minute like, “Kidding! Fooled you! I need the table!” Hat# 4: Story Teller (apparently).
Once we do a quick sound check, and test the lights full-on to locate ‘weak’ circuit breakers (Hat #5: Lighting Designer), we slip into the nearest restroom to change into our work clothes. We put Clark Kent to shame by changing in a 2’x2’ space all while never touching the floor with our bare feet. Our tuxedo is our uniform, and our mic is our badge.
We begin by announcing the key players of the event (Hat #6: Master of Ceremonies). We coordinate the timeline with the wait staff, the banquet manager, the photographer, the videographer, the butcher, the baker, the candlestick maker (Hat #7: On-site Event Coordinator). Even when someone else is wearing the Event Coordinator hat, we ultimately get handed that hat once the guest’s butts touch their chairs.
Throughout the event, we juggle playing the couple’s chosen songs vs. the adult guests requested songs vs. the children’s requested songs (usually 180 degrees opposite of the adult requests) vs. what we ‘know’ will work at any given moment that results in a full dance floor (Hat# 8: Music Programmer).
We get approached by several people during the whole she-bang who ask things like, “Do you have that song?…you know…it’s about a girl…who was in love…it was really popular 10-20 years ago…I think. It was in that movie with that actress with the long hair…anyway…do you have it?” (insert blank stare here)
Hat# 9: The ‘Amazing Kreskin’
We chase after elusive wait staff to inquire where the room light switches are. If we’re lucky, we get ‘pointed’ to where they are. If not, we get shrugged shoulders, and they scurry away to the kitchen/hive, never to be seen by human eyes ever again. Either way, we’re the ones who ultimately need to weave our way through guests in various positions of getting up from the table, pushing their chairs out at the last second, while they somehow don’t hear the first 8 “excuse me’s”, so that we can play Russian Roulette with the switches hoping to find the ones that dim the lights on the dance floor so that ‘our’ lights actually work as designed (Hat #10: Set Director).
“Where are the bathrooms?” “Is dinner going to be served soon?” “Can you get us an extra chair over here?” “Someone dropped their Sloe-Gin Fizz on the dance floor…better get someone to clean it up!” (Hat #11: Shell Answer Man) (An old TV commercial reference, I know. Work with me people.).
Bride and groom needed to cut the cake. Wait, the bride is in the bathroom. Oh, here she is! Now where did the groom go?! There he is…out in the hall with his friends. The bride offers to get him…disappearing out ‘this’ door, while the groom magically appears through ‘that’ door. Now an APB is sent out on the bride (“Be on the lookout for a stressed/worried/tipsy woman, wearing white, goes by the name of “Where’s my wife?””). She now pops in ‘that’ door while the groom now slips out ‘this’ door to look for her. Introducing, Hat #12: Daycare Provider.
Knife for the cake?! Is that really needed? And you need a chair for the garter? That makes no sense! (Hat #13: Prop Master)
“Can you make an announcement that a set of dentures was found mixed in with the couple’s wedding gifts, please!” Hat #14: Loss Prevention Officer.
Happy and smiling bridal couple approaches at the end of the night and thanks DJ for a wonderful time. Hat #15…A Successful DJ!
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